Bum Jokes are a hilarious way to add a little cheeky fun to your day. Whether you’re in the mood for clean laughs, silly humor, or lighthearted jokes you can share with friends and family, bum jokes never fail to crack a smile. Simple, playful, and universally funny, these jokes are perfect for breaking the ice, brightening conversations, or just enjoying a good laugh when you need it most.
Bum Jokes
Why did the bum sit in the front row?
Because it didn’t want to be behind!
What do you call a bum that tells jokes?
A cheeky comedian.
Why did the bum go to school?
To learn how to sit properly.
What’s a bum’s favorite exercise?
Squats—they really have a good seat.
Why did the bum bring a chair to the party?
It wanted extra support.
How do you make a bum laugh?
Tell it a cheeky joke!
Why was the bum always calm?
Because it never gets stressed—it sits things out.
What did one bum say to the other at the gym?
“We really need to work on our backing.”
Why did the bum get a promotion?
It always had your back.
What’s a bum’s favorite type of music?
Hip-hop—it’s all about the moves.
Why did the bum start a podcast?
To share cheeky stories.
How do you know a bum is smart?
It’s always on the right seat of knowledge.
Why did the bum fail the math test?
It couldn’t get a handle on the angles.
What’s a bum’s favorite holiday?
Sit-ting Day!
How does a bum keep fit?
By sitting tight and standing out.
Why did the bum refuse to argue?
It prefers to stay seated.
Why was the bum invited to every party?
Because it always brings a seat to share.
How did the bum win the race?
It had a strong backing.
What’s a bum’s motto?
“Always sit back and enjoy life!”
You Bum Jokes
You bum, even your chair files complaints about you.
You bum, the couch cries every time you leave.
You bum, your snacks have snacks hidden from you.
You bum, you make lazy look like an Olympic sport.
You bum, even your shadow needs a break from you.
You bum, the floor sighs whenever you walk by.
You bum, your bed misses you when you’re not sleeping.
You bum, your slippers are plotting a mutiny.
You bum, even the remote hides from you.
You bum, the fridge closes itself when you approach.
You bum, you could teach a masterclass in sitting.
You bum, even the Wi-Fi groans at your commands.
You bum, your pajamas feel overqualified.
You bum, the clock slows down to match your pace.
You bum, even your coffee needs a coffee before waking you up.
You bum, your Netflix account files for a vacation from you.
You bum, the floorboards complain when you walk.
You bum, even gravity gave up trying to motivate you.
You bum, you make “chilling” look like extreme sports.
You bum, your shadow leaves early to escape you.
You Bum Jokes One Liners
You bum, even your shadow wants a break from you.
You bum, your chair called—it’s tired of holding you.
You bum, even your mirror rolls its eyes at you.
You bum, the couch filed a complaint about overuse.
You bum, you put the “lazy” in layabout.
You bum, even gravity gave up on you.
You bum, your snacks have snacks.
You bum, the floor misses your footsteps… or maybe not.
You bum, you make reclining look like an art form.
You bum, even your slippers are judging you.
You bum, your procrastination has its own fan club.
You bum, the remote hides when you walk by.
You bum, your Wi-Fi gets tired from working for you.
You bum, you could win gold in the sitting Olympics.
You bum, even your pajamas are overqualified for you.
You bum, the fridge sighs every time you open it.
You bum, you bring new meaning to “taking a seat.”
You bum, even the clock is too lazy to tick for you.
You bum, your shadow needs coffee before following you.
You bum, you make “Netflix and chill” look like hard work.
Bum Jokes One-Liners
My bum isn’t lazy, it’s just conserving energy.
I sat so long, my bum applied for residency.
Never trust a smiling bum—it’s up to something.
My bum thinks it’s a pillow.
If bums could talk, mine would never shut up.
My chair has a restraining order against my bum.
Bums don’t sweat, they just shine.
My bum has more fans than me.
Don’t underestimate a quiet bum—it’s plotting.
My bum’s so comfy, even my couch is jealous.
Bums: the unsung heroes of sitting.
My bum gives new meaning to “taking a seat.”
I don’t have a flat butt, I have a horizontal ambition.
My bum and I are inseparable—we really stick together.
Even my shadow is impressed by my bum.
My bum doesn’t argue—it just backs me up.
Bums: the reason chairs exist.
My bum’s favorite hobby? Supporting me.
Life’s too short for uncomfortable bums.
My bum doesn’t procrastinate—it waits strategically.
Short Bum Jokes One-Liners
My bum has its own fan club.
Bums: the original seat experts.
Sit happens.
Don’t push my buttons—or my bum.
My bum needs a vacation.
Bums: supporting life since forever.
Rear view, best view.
My chair fears my bum.
Bums never quit—they just lounge.
Back it up!
My bum has attitude.
Sit tight, it’s a long day.
Bums don’t argue—they sit.
Cheeky and proud.
My bum works overtime.
Seats beware!
Life’s better from behind.
My bum runs the show.
Rear power activated.
Don’t sit on my dreams—sit on your own!
